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Oh boy, rules are like the party poopers of life, always raining on our parade. But don't you worry, I'm not a dictator with a never-ending list of orders. I'm more like a laid-back sloth, just a few rules here and there to keep things from going cray-cray.

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👾For my donation I only accept cold, hard cash. Unless you're depositing a gold bar, then I can make an exception. Sorry, no IOUs from your grandma's cookie jar.


👾No explicit or provactive language at anytime while booking.


👾Please refrain from using the secret language of the Illuminati, abbreviations, or any other cryptic code when sending an email. I promise not to decode your message, but I can't guarantee that the NSA won't.


👾If you're gonna be tardy to the party or got a hunch that you might be, kindly let me know.


👾Booking blindly is like playing Russian Roulette with your vacation plans. Know what you're booking, or you might end up leaving Vegas without partaking in any of the Sin of Sin City.


👾As far as protection goes, I’ve got you covered. Literally. I have many fits and sizes to choose from. 


👾 If you book me because you think trying to dominate or push my boundaries will be a fun power dynamic, let me stop you right there. It won’t be fun. I am not a switch. I am not a submissive when it comes to that kind of power dynamic. It’s not a game I play. It’s the proper way to ask me to high-five your face with my hand or to give your dude piston a nice little fist bump. I will fully press charges on you should you try because I’m telling you now it’s a no. 


👾No videos and no photos allowed of me at anytime. 


👾Hey there, guy! Let's cut to the chase, I'm not a psychic. So, please, pretty please, communicate your booking details in a clear and concise way. Give me a ballpark figure of the time-frame you're thinking of and let me know where you want the party to take place. Don't make me channel my inner Sherlock Holmes to figure out what you want. Cheers!


👾Here’s the 411. My rates are as firm as a bodybuilder's biceps. They are non-negotiable, just like the fact that Mondays suck and pizza is life. So please don't waste your time trying to haggle with me.

That’s embarrassing. I’d rather spend that time doing something more productive, like brainstorming new ways to make you 🍾

Deal? Deal.


👾Outcall inquiries must be a 4-star hotel at minimum. Residential visits are for established clients only.

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